How to choose your bridesmaids...
From the time we are little girls, we start planning the wedding of our dreams. The prince standing beside us, the dress, the flowers, your best friends helping you get ready. As I think about this I imagine myself as a little girl in my halloween wedding dress costume playing with my childhood friends.Then I picture my actual wedding. Now where are those little girls? I’d like to say something about how we all grew into classy, beautiful young ladies and those little girls turned out to be standing by my side on my wedding day. That my friends, would be a lie. Hopefully some of you are lucky and have had the same group of girlfriends your entire lives.
If you are anything like me, you started out with cute and fun elementary school friends like this:
Who grew into girls like this:
I hope you were able to graduate into finding new college friends who eventually turned into soulmates. After all the quote goes, “I didn't come to college to find a man, I came to find my bridesmaids.”
Now choosing your bridesmaids is a very important decision that I think a lot of brides take lightly. These are the women who will help you through this wedding planning process. You want the very best people in your corner.
Here are the three questions to ask yourself when choosing your bridesmaids:
Can they afford being a bridesmaid?/ Are these girls willing to spend a lot of money to be my bridesmaid?
This is a struggle I have seen while working at Bridesmaids, Inc. Most brides don't want their bridesmaids to have to fork out a lot of money to be in the wedding. There are a few ways you can handle this situation. You can ask them what they can afford when it comes to being in the wedding and then you should explain to them your expectations of their bridesmaids expenses. I know this is not the exciting part of choosing who will stand beside you in your wedding, but it could save you some hurt feelings in the future.
Can you live without *insert bridesmaid here* in your wedding?
Ignore the pressure. She does not have to be in your wedding if you were in hers. People grow apart. It happens. There is no written rule saying your cousins or your sister in laws have to be in your wedding. Your best friend from ten years ago that you only talk to once a year also does not have to be in your wedding. Keep in mind these women will be in your pictures for years and years. I never wanted to have the moment where I would be showing my wedding pictures to my children and have to say I was no longer friends with the a bridesmaid in my pictures.
Will they make a good bridesmaid?
Lets be honest, everyone “wants” to be a bridesmaid the moment you get engaged. They want to be one of the “chosen few”. But you need to be able to completely trust these girls. Will they order their bridesmaids dress on time? Can I count on them to show up to the wedding functions? Will they only express their opinions on the wedding or bridesmaids dress when I ask and really need it? Planning a wedding can be STRESSFUL. The last thing you want are some catty girls who judge your reaction when it gets tough. Working in the wedding industry and spending most of my time around brides and their maids, I have seen a lot of brides get burned in this process. Wedding planning can turn the easiest going girl into a nut case, so you need the girls you trust when you are at your worst.